Wednesday, August 20, 2014

A Penny for Your Virus?

How much would you pay for a virus?

Before you answer that, no, in this scenario you are not the villain of a Mission: Impossible flick.

If, instead, you are a 17th century Dutch investor, you might be willing to pay the equivalent of ten years' income. Ten years of hard work just to buy...


Yep, that's a tulip.

Back in the 1630s, in a phenomenon known as Tulip Mania, tulip prices in the Netherlands soared to unstable heights. The most expensive tulips were like the one pictured above: striped instead of solid.

And what caused those stripes? A virus! The "tulip breaking virus" specifically, which, in addition to the stripes, causes the tulip to weaken. Weak = rare. Rare = valuable. And there you have it--a virus worth loads of money.

Now I get that tulips are beautiful. Personally I like the solid colors better, especially the yellow ones.

gratuitous yellow tulips

But regardless of color or design, tulips are my favorite flowers. I mean, just look at these. Such vibrant colors! Still, I would never pay thousands of dollars for one bulb.

But then... I'm not a 17th century Dutch investor, am I?


[This post brought to you by: "Eeeeeee, tulips!" aka: "I have a shiny new book idea, but I can't work on it yet, so here's some research thinly disguised as a blog post."]

Wednesday, August 13, 2014

A Matter of Degree

I write books.

(No, really? You don't say!)

But that wasn't always the plan. When I started out in college I had no idea what I wanted to do. I studied a whole bunch of math because I was good at it, and when the major I was hoping for fell through, the easiest alternative was to fall back on a math major. I didn't realize I wanted to be a writer until my senior year.

Sometimes I wonder: if I had known then what I know now, what would I have chosen to study?

So, just for fun, here's a (not very well thought out) guide to majoring in "I want to be a fantasy writer."

1. Take lots of English classes. Don't bother taking too many English classes. Unless they sound really interesting, like Beowulf. (Have I ever mentioned I've considered adopting a really ugly cat and naming it Grendel?) Instead, read a lot of fantasy in whatever free time you get.

2. Caveat: take lots of Linguistics. I only really understood English after I studied lots of other languages. (And I do love diagramming sentences. *sigh*)

3. Throw in a good bit of Anthropology. Roll a die to see which courses you get--you can hardly go wrong.

3a. Take an Anthropology of Music class. Music is a kind of magic, right? Decide you would rather be a musician. Drop everything, take piano lessons and become a composer.

3b. Take an Anthropology of Food class. (After all, people love reading long descriptions of every single meal your characters eat, down to the minute details of preparation.) Realize you'll probably be cooking for the rest of your life, so you might as well be good at it. Enroll in culinary school instead.

4. Take a Mythology class for inspiration. Add in some Military Science if you plan to have any warfare in your books.

5. Choose a track: Contemporary, Historical or Other-world Fantasy

5a. Contemporary. Take some introductory Biology, Chemistry and Astronomy. You can't break science with magic until you know how it works!

5b. Historical. Take a bunch of Medieval Studies classes. Come to the conclusion that there are enough Medieval Fantasy stories in the world, and that it was a rather brutish time period anyway. Take several History courses from multiple eras all over the world instead. You'll probably not hit on the one era you end up wanting to write about, but at least you'll know how to do research!

5c. Other-world. Take Economics. Geology. Political Science. Religion. A bit more Anthropology for good measure. Fight the disappointment that slowly dawns on you as you realize no world you design will ever be quite as real as the real world.

6. Add in some Psychology if you still have room for it.

7. Succumb to burn-out. Remember that you used to be so good at math. Wonder if you still might be able to make a career out of it somehow...

In retrospect, maybe my studies, unconventional as they were for a writer, set me along precisely the right path in the end.

Thursday, July 31, 2014

Gleeful Destruction

Something happened to me this past week. I became the mother of a one-year-old. It just sort of happened, which I suppose is how these things work, but I'm still a little stunned. All of a sudden BOOM! One.

I mean, I'm used to a big boss fight before a level up. You gear up and gear up and then fight for your life to earn that level. I know, I earned this badge with every diaper changed and grubby hand cleaned. Still, this particular level up was a bit anti-climactic.

Though that might have been due to the fact that our entire household came down with the cold of doom a day before the birthday. We had to postpone his party and spent the day taking turns passed out on the couch. Maybe I'll feel a little less off-kilter once we're finally all well enough to celebrate properly.

It's been quite the year, and I've done my share of reminiscing this week. Babies change so much in the first year. They're constantly learning--how to walk, how to talk, how to get away with everything under the sun... It's kind of funny the order that they learn things in, though. You'd think "Ow, that hurt. Maybe I should be more careful next time," would be a pretty nifty lesson to have in hand, but apparently it's less important than "I can stick my toes in my mouth!"

Another lesson that has yet to be learned: that things can't always be fixed when they're broken. There's no concept of permanent damage. My son recently picked a flower to play with, and then a few minutes later he tried to return it to its stalk. He was pretty unfazed by the fact that it didn't work. After all, there's a lot he doesn't have the dexterity for yet, and most of the time after a few tries he gets bored and does something else.

One of the results of this knowledge gap is that there's nothing to impede his joy of destruction. Those of us who do know better can't escape a warning going off in our minds before we pick the flower, or put the paper through the shredder, or smash a glass on the concrete. We know that what we're doing can't be undone. And that's a good thing! Can you imagine going through life without that hesitation?

And yet, I think there's something to be learned from the gleeful destruction of a child. My son simply loves knocking down towers of blocks. He approaches his task with abandon and gives it his all. He really goes for the total destruction.

I should be more like that with my work. I mean, obviously not when doing the dishes or driving around doing errands. But my writing could use a little more destruction. I hesitate too much before committing to chaos. The same hesitation that protects me in real life hampers me in my drafts.

But what if I can't put it back the way it was!

That's the beauty of writing, though. It can always be rewritten. So why not try, just to see what happens? Turn up the chaos, see where it goes. Future drafts can always dial down the destruction.

So that's one of my goals this year (you know, in addition to keeping the boy alive all year). Do you have any new writing goals lately?

Tuesday, July 22, 2014

Real Teens of 2014: Wondergirl

[Real Teens of 2014 is a blog series with interviews of middle and high schoolers. Interview questions are chosen by the interviewee from a list, and answers are presented unedited.]

Code Name: Wondergirl

Pick one of these and turn it into an accessory. How would you wear it? 
-a sippy cup 
-a toy car 
-a hula hoop 
-a lamp shade 
-pipe cleaners

If I had to wear a toy car I'd get two of them and wear them on my feet so I could stake around.

You have to fight at troll. Would you rather have a... 
-vacuum cleaner 
-or squirt gun 
and why?

If I had to fight a troll I'd use a flashlight to shine it in his eyes and blind him while I run by or push him off the bridge.

What's the worst/best thing you've ever tasted or smelled?

Worst thing I ever tasted was when I chewed a fish oil thing I ever tasted was home made dinner after being soo incredibly hungry, tired and cold for many hours.

If you could pick one subject and know everything there is to know about it, what would you pick?

If I could know everything about one subject I'd pick math.


New fashion statement alert for the roller rinks out there: roller skates should now be made to look like cars.

Thursday, July 17, 2014

Real Teens of 2014: Wallflower

[Real Teens of 2014 is a blog series with interviews of middle and high schoolers. Interview questions are chosen by the interviewee from a list, and answers are presented unedited.]

Code name: Wallflower

Favorite book: The Giver by Lois Lowry

Who do you most admire and why?

There are two people I currently admire, Misha Collins and Bo Burnham. I admire both because they use their status in society to make a difference in the world, whether it is directly or indirectly. For example, Misha, who plays Castiel in Supernatural, tries to get his "minions" or his fans to make random acts of kindness and slowly change the world. In addition, there's Bo, a musical comedian, who compose songs that calls out social issues other artists are afraid to speak out against. He is able to make his songs entertaining and funny which makes it more difficult for some people to truly get his message because they don't try to understand his lyrics, they just listen for the beat.

What's one thing you wish everyone in the world understood?

It is okay to be different. Our differences is what allows us to thrive as a whole. One's weakness is another's strength. If everyone in the world could understand this, we would probably have a better world.

Describe an "average" teen. How are you different?

Honestly, I don't think I'm in the position to describe the "average" teenager. I don't think anyone is. My average is guaranteed to be different from someone else's average. However, I do like this question because I have always felt different from the average teen. In my opinion, the average teen has a plethora of friends, some that they don't even like. They go to parties/ hangout on weekends. They skip classes, try drugs, and smoke. Basically, they are extroverted people and desire the company of others. That is where I differ from them, I would describe myself as an introvert. I don't mind the company of others, if I like them, but I also don't wish for it, most of the time. I am fine with being alone and just thinking. I prefer the dark with music playing, that's where my peace is.

What's the best gift you have given or received?

My friend Kalyn, got me Bo Burnham's book Egghead for my birthday this year because it's the only thing I really wanted this year. She visited multiple bookstores to find it and I think that's extremely sweet. The book itself is FANTASTIC, it's not only filled with funny poems but there are profound and thought provoking poems there too. I couldn't have asked for a better birthday present.


Great stuff! Thanks so much, Wallflower!